writer's inconvenient scheduling

my very best writing time used to be mid-afternoon.  while at byu, i had a twenty minute walk home from class everyday.  usually afternoon and usually alone.  i didn't realize it at the time, but that walk was absolutely ideal writing prep time.  on my way home, i'd day dream, process the day's happenings, and think deep thoughts about life, religion and the social sciences (as if i didn't get enough of it in class...).  typically, once i'd get home, i'd plop my backpack on the bed, sit in my chair and write until everything was out of my head.  most of the time i wouldn't even take off my shoes or my coat, which is pretty unusual for me - i'm comfort-demanding.

i feel like some of my best writing came from that time period, where my schedule had built-in thinking/pondering time.  and i think that's one of my biggest blocks, too.  right now, there isn't thinking time in my schedule.  the closest thing i have to mindless time right now (where i can't be doing anything else productive at the same time) is while i'm at the gym.  and let's be honest, here... while i'm at the gym my thoughts look something like this:

i'm so tired.
NO! i'm happy!  i'm energized!  i'm waking up!
...but my legs hurt..
YOU CAN DO THIS!  run run run, you're getting faster, you're running longer!
it isn't a big deal if i stop thirty seconds early....right?
I CAN FINISH! I CAN FINISH!


and so on.  it's difficult to brainstorm and think deep thoughts about anything when your mind is engaged in a constant battle of self-discipline against sore muscles.

this schedule, with no think time, is creating the illusion of writer's block.  for the last week, i sit down to write and stare at a blank screen for five minutes or so.  then over the next 15 minutes, i start six different sentences on different topics, backspacing each before the thought is even complete.  then finally i'll start a thought that feels sustainable (for a couple paragraphs, at least) and before i have a full paragraph sketched out, it's time to move on to something else.  so then right before bed, i'll hurriedly finish a few thoughts and click publish with no particular attachment to what i've just written.

which makes me kind of sad.

i'm seriously considering giving myself 15 minutes of meditation time before i write any words at all... that might do the trick.  or maybe some writing prompts?  my goal to write every day this month is looking pretty bleak after one week.  i want to write every day to practice, but i would really dislike writing 30 days of blah.

i need another challenge, i think.  and so the search will begin.  tomorrow.  tonight, i'm going to push publish without even so much as a read through and start trying to conquer the goal in the morning light.

also, i'm welcome to suggestions. really.