the unlikely conversation

dear future,

i'm taking a major risk -  one i've been {to be frank} pretty darn scared of this last year.  i wish i could talk to you right now, face to face.  i want to sit down and have a massive prioritizing session with you.  i want to ask you,
"are my decisions making you pull your {longer} hair out?"
"is this a time to be completely logical or let my heart take one of the reins again?"
"how hard, exactly, will it be to be in seattle this summer?"
"am i being too risky??"

i know, all this risk-taking behavior the last two semesters is quite uncharacteristic of the sort-or-not-really adult me.  it's more reminiscent of the reckless teenage me, the one who's heart had full hold on both reins.  but, isn't a little risk a good thing?

i'm unsure.
all i know right now is it feels darn good.

which is why i wish we could visit - that darn goodness can lead in two directions: fabulous and disastrous.  which is terrifying. . .and absolutely exhilarating!

wishing like mad i could meet you,
love a hesitantly exhilarated you.